It was as if the air hadbecome clearer, as if everything he saw and felt had snapped into thetightest focus he had ever known. He saw and felt things ...ith a clarity whichwas so intense that it felt as if he were dreaming, but he knew that in someway he had never been wider awake.This was a moment of truth, a moment at which he might cross over a divide, adivide invisible and, in truth, absent from the lives of most people. He knewthat if he volunteered a name, that he would be forever. She said that her dad had told her previously that he hated how she resisted the spankings and knew that he had to feel her completely accept the spankings before he could quit. I smiled and told her that I understood, you can always tell when a person quits fighting and simply accepts. After he was finished she said that he simply sat her (gingerly) on his lap and just held her until the calmed down. He told her that she had “paid for her sins” and all was ok. After a few minutes he left her. One way or another I was going to get around these problems and see Daddies penis no matter what!Well the very next Saturday mom must have let her guard down some, she did get me up, she did take Smiggles out of their room. But, she didn’t make me get dressed, thank god for that. With mom gone I stood just outside Daddies door not making a sound, Mr Smiggles was wrapping himself around my legs and obviously wanted in my parents room. I could have sworn that I heard Daddy call my name softly, I. "Jen knew she loved him, but she was petrified of him saying nothing after she told him so, or of him saying, "I don't know if I love you."But she didn't want him to say it if he didn't mean it, or immediately jump into bed with him as soon as he did. She knew he'd probably think she was easy if she did that. Hell, she would be easy, she thought. His friends sometimes were jerks to her, saying, "Have you slept with Ryan yet? Why not? Don't you like him? Are you a prude or something?" He was.
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